Feeling This Shirt Today

Click Here If You Like Fake (Grammar-Themed) Band Names or Book Reviews of Books Not Usually Reviewed

Check out my 25 Point Review of the Webster’s New World English Grammar Handbook on HTMLGIANT, complete with probable grammatical errors because I haven’t actually gotten all the way through the book yet.

http://htmlgiant.com/reviews/25-points-websters-new-world-english-grammar-handbook/

Some Thoughts On Books and Mental Health and Podcasts

I’ve been thinking a lot about mental health lately. You can blame the crappy weather or the books I’ve been reading (apparently, a non-fiction book about suicide doesn’t exactly put one in the happiest headspace, but whatever.) So, I’m going to recommend some stuff while also talking a little bit about mental health. That’s all the structure I’ve got. Deal with it. 

100 Rejections Or, This Is What It is To Be A Writer

As someone who didn’t go on a date until she was eighteen, I’m pretty familiar with rejection. (Is a trip to the dining hall a date? What about hanging out in someone else’s dorm room? Based on some people’s “date” parameters, it is entirely possible that I’ve still never been on an actual date.)

We the Animals by Justin Torres: A Review

In the interest of trying new things, here is a book review by me, someone who has never written a book review before. Even if you don’t read my book review, you should go read this book. My kindle said it would only take 1 hour and 27 minutes to read. No excuses.

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How to Give the Perfect Gift (Will Not Be Answered In This Post)

Among other things, I am bad at giving presents. Truly the worst. Like most things, it sends me into an existential panic greatly disproportionate to the task at hand. As soon as it is time to give someone a present (Christmas, birthdays, life events) it is like I can no longer even imagine any products in the world or any facts about the person in question. Suddenly, even though I’ve known Katie my whole life, I’m all like, “Well, Katie…has arms. Maybe she’d like some….arm stuff?”

Book Shame: Or, the Time I Brought Infinite Jest to the Beach.

As a writer, it’s pretty easy to take yourself too seriously. I mean, no one else is going to do it for you. “Oh, you think my Creative Writing Degree is a joke, well I’ve read Proust in three different languages. Tell me more about your job at Soul Crushing Inc.”

(Disclaimer: The writer of this blog post does not claim to have actually read Proust in any of the languages.)

Advice for People Writing Advice for Writers

7 Ways to Make Writing Advice Suck Less 

I will literally click on any link that says “Writing Advice.” The link may come from the New Yorker or someone’s Angelfire website from 1999. Doesn’t matter. I will read that crap out of it.

Before we get to what that means about me (spoiler: nothing good) let’s maybe just agree that if you’ve read one list of Ten Ways to Improve Your Writing, you’ve read them all. Obviously, there are exceptions. There are always exceptions. But for the most part, we are just churning out vague and often self-explanatory advice to people who legitimately want to get better at something that is really, really hard.

People Like Lists, Right?

Anyone with anxiety knows that the biggest threat to composure is having time to think. As a general rule, I like to give myself as little time to “think” as humanly possible, assuming that, in this instance, “think” means “obsess.”

This means that sometimes when I’m driving, I can’t listen to music, because music only serves as a soundtrack to my anxiety. So instead of just imagining that the slightly wobbly looking tire of the man driving in front of me is going to somehow lead to a bloody heap of twisted metal and carnage, I imagine these things with a score by Rilo Kiley.

Obligatory First Post

If you’re anything like me, you’ve spent most of your non-working, waking hours in a state of near constant panic. Does the joke you made in your Statement of Purpose make you seem crass? Did you accidentally forget to change the name of the school on your writing sample cover page? Did a hostile mail carrier toss your packet into the shredder instead of sending it off to Michigan?